Connection During Overwhelming Times

WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER

Most of us are staying home due to the coronavirus. This has created a great amount of fear and uncertainty in many areas of our lives. Will my family be safe and healthy? How will this affect my job? How can I pay my bills when I can’t go to work?

There are several points I would like us to remember.

Keep this in perspective. Viruses have always been with us. They come and they go. Some have more intense symptoms than others, however, God has given us bodies that develop antibodies to fight off the viruses and bring us back to health. Remember, there is a flu (influenza) season each year and the medical community have developed helps for preventing us from getting the virus or medicine that will treat us and make us well again.
Remember there is a bigger picture. For those of us who have a biblical worldview, there is a calm assurance that the God of the universe is with us even through this. How do we know he cares about us and is with us? This past weekend we celebrate an event that changed the world and our understanding of death and what happens after death.

What Jesus did long ago, that we still celebrate today at Easter, is as an innocent man allowed himself to be unjustly killed. He did this on purpose for a purpose. He said it himself, “God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whoever believe in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.”

You might wonder, what does that have to do with me in the world today and what do we need to be saved from? We all struggle with our human nature that seems to drive us to do destructive actions toward ourselves and others. Jesus said, “For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these things come from within and defile a person.” Well, that pretty much covers it. I know I struggle with a number of the things on the list.

What is the good news? The good news is you can be free and forgiven from this destructive nature. Jesus can reconnect you to God. Jesus tells us that God is our heavenly father and he wants a relationship with us. When we admit we need him and put our trust in Jesus, we receive this eternal life and become a new person. It’s like being born again. The old person is gone, and we are a new person who is forgiven and free. God guides us in our daily lives and we can be assured that if we die we will go to heaven.

Judy and I have done this, and it has calmed our fears, because no matter what we encounter in this life, he is there with us. If you have questions or would like to talk more about this please give us a call or an email.

3. Reassure each other with the confidence of the solution to the fear of death.

How do you that? You can point to the evidence of a biblical worldview: historical evidence, archaeological evidence, testimonial evidence. A great resource is the book, Evidence That Demands a Verdict by Josh McDowell. And another resource is people you know who can share why they have hope even in overwhelming times.

4. Remember to keep the connection by doing activities together.

Confident parents have the important role of introducing fun and play into the family. It is important to note that fun and play does not equal spending money. Some of the free simple forms of fun and play often can be the most memorable.

It is important to note that fun and play
does not equal spending money.
Some of the free simple forms of fun and play
often can be the most memorable.

Our children and young adults (teens) crave more than anything else in life is to be loved and needed. Confident parents provide those by developing a heart-string connection to them early in life and a family atmosphere with large amounts of time for fun, togetherness and learning.

Simple memorable family activities take a little creativity, yet they will draw your family together like few other activities. Here are a list from the Very Well Family website.

Make a “tent” out of sheets. Take turns reading to each other.

Make milkshakes or smoothies. Conduct kitchen science experiments.

Paint your nails together. Have a spa night with oatmeal-honey facials.

Look through old photo albums together.

Watch your child’s favorite TV show or movie together.

Play a video game together. Exercise together.

Do a puzzle. Play a board game.

Help them clean their room. Rearrange their bedroom furniture.

Pull out a box of toys they haven’t played with for a while. Build Legos together.

Play with dolls together. Play store, restaurant, or ice cream stand together.

Go to the park. Ride bikes.

Sit outside and look at the stars. Eat breakfast together.

Teach your child how to cook. Teach your child how to play solitaire or chess.

Style your child’s hair. Let your child style your hair.

Share a memory about how you handled conflict or stood up to a bully when you were a kid.

Visit the library. Visit a free public museum.

Visit a garden. Take a walk in the woods.

Plant seeds from something you’ve eaten, such as apples or watermelons.

Draw on the sidewalk with sidewalk chalk. Run through the sprinklers together.

Take your dog to a dog park or visit the local humane society.

Volunteer together. Bake brownies or cupcakes together.

Have a tea party. Play school or office together.

Swing on the swings together. Have a water balloon fight.

Jump on a trampoline together. Visit a nursing home.

Make your own treasure map. Play 20 questions.

Play I Spy. Wash your car together.

Listen to your favorites songs together. Listen to an audio CD together.

Make pancakes in the shape of your child’s initials.

Make ice cream floats for dessert. Race matchbox cars.

Teach your dog tricks. Teach your child a song you sang as a kid.

Read your favorite childhood picture book together.

Make a family tree. Make your own memory game out of family photographs.

Scrapbook together. Help your child send an email to a grandparent, aunt, or uncle.

Make a care package to send to a relative who lives far away.

Write encouraging letters to each other and then mail them three months from now.

Draw caricatures of each other. Write a story together.

Have a picnic outside or on the living room floor.

Build animal families out of homemade play-doh.

Role play how to handle a tough situation, like making friends, or saying no to peer pressure.

Teach your child how to ride a bike. Make up a silly song together.

Teach one another some new dance moves. Catch fireflies.

Tell your child three things you really like about him or her.

Make a special breakfast “just because.” Take a trust walk.

Make necklaces out of colored pasta shapes and dental floss.

Make swords out of rolled up newspaper, and have a pretend sword fight.

Climb a tree. Play tennis.

Put on skits for your neighbors. Make a meal together for someone else.

Have something unusual for dinner-like air-popped popcorn and fresh fruit.

Build something out of trash/recycling items.

Create a new voicemail message together.

Make a slideshow of your favorite digital photographs.

Pick flowers and press them in wax paper. Make bookmarks.

Let your child teach you about something he or she knows or does well.

Collect leaves and then try to identify them by researching them online or at the local library.

Make life-size drawings of each other on the back of some old wrapping paper.

Play in the sand together, at the beach, a local park, or your child’s own sandbox.

Go bird watching. Play catch or soccer.

Help your child practice a sport he or she enjoys.

Visit a local music store and sample each other’s favorite artists.

Go to a free event for kids’ sponsored by your local library or a book, craft, or hardware store.

Write messages on the mirror for one another with soap.

Create memory boxes for your child’s favorite pictures, artwork, and mementos.

Create a special place in your home for displaying your child’s artwork.

Let him or her choose what to display in the place mentioned above.

Help your child fix a broken item or toy.

Watch your child play a sport or take him or her to see a friend’s game.

Visit a skate park together and watch older kids do tricks.

Source: https://www.verywellfamily.com/absolutely-free-activities-for-kids-2997490

Attributes of a Biblical Worldview

Faith in God is a supernatural relationship. It affirms your value as a human being because you know the validity of who Jesus claimed to be and what He said and did while living among us. He validated his authority over disease, nature and the destructive selfishness of the human heart. When you accept and follow Jesus, He promises to be with you on the journey of life here on earth and after our death, He promises eternal life. He also promised He would send His Spirit to guide you. The power of a Biblical worldview is the way it transforms you from the inside out.

How does all this relate to Confident Parenting & Family Connections?

In a family, we are individuals relating to each other which we call relationships. Before you can have healthy relationships with others, we need to know and understand ourselves.

We are all wounded people. We are flawed people- we mess up, make mistakes knowingly and unknowingly and make destructive choices that end up hurting ourselves and others. The most powerful force in the universe can transform you, as you surrender yourself to a relationship with Him. How will we be transformed? As I have stated earlier, the Bible shows us that having an encounter with Jesus Christ will change you forever. You will begin the process of becoming more like Jesus.

When we think about Jesus and His attributes there are four attributes that stand out.

FOUR ATTRIBUTES OF JESUS THAT WE GAIN WITH A BIBLICAL WORLDVIEW

There are many attributes of Jesus that He demonstrated during His time on earth. However, the following four stand out as defining qualities of Jesus. These are the qualities that help strengthen connections in our family relationships as well as all our relationships of life.

Attribute #1- Humility

One of the most powerful anecdotes to selfishness is humility. Humility could also be referred to as selflessness. You don’t consider yourself as more important than others. You don’t think about what is good for you but rather look out for what is good for others.

The humility of Jesus is shown in the way he arrived in life. He came as a helpless baby, in a small town, in a stable. He did not come with a demonstration of power and authority, in the capital city or in a palace. Jesus demonstrated His power & authority over disease, nature and death so He had no reason to be humble. When you look at the life of Jesus, you see His humility coming through as He saw the needs of the marginalized and outcasts of society. He encouraged everyone to look at life in a way that put love for God and love for our neighbor as our primary focus in life. He demonstrated His humility and love by trusting God as He was unjustly put to death for a greater purpose. Out of love, He willingly died to reconnect us to God.

Attribute #2- Empathy

Empathy is when you can take the perspective of another person. You join them where they are by not judging them, or trying to make things better. You come alongside them in what they are experiencing, that says, “I feel with you.” This is the most powerful way to connect with others.

Jesus has a way of coming alongside people in their distress that says, “I am with you in this.” He also pointed us to God and taught us that God is our Heavenly Father, who loves us and cares about us as individuals. Jesus said, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Attribute #3- Gratitude

Gratitude is what make what you have…. enough. Gratitude is a way of looking at life that takes each moment as a gift. You show a great appreciation for life, your possessions and your relationships. You have gradatude for the possessions and relationships that positively affect your life and you demonstrate your appreciation by the way you live your life.

We see in the life of Jesus a gratitude for life that showed in the way He valued each person He encountered. He was especially drawn to the hurting and the outcasts. He had harsh words for those who devalued people. He spent his life without a home yet was consistently pointing out the good news of God’s love for us. He lived a life of gratitude.

Attribute #4- Forgiveness

Forgiveness is releasing a person who has wronged us, from the judgement that is deserved. This concept of forgiveness is actually a healthy way to neutralize toxic emotions. Unforgiven wrongs often produce bitterness in us that is a poison that effects our outlook on life and our ability to have healthy trusting relationships. When we release a person from judgement, we free ourselves from holding on to that debt.

Jesus asks us to forgive others just as we have been forgiven of the wrongs we have done toward God and others. He often referred to Himself as being sent from His Father to cleanse (forgive) us from our selfish nature and reconnect us with God, our Heavenly Father. Jesus said, “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.”

Does intelligent Design Point to God?

DOES INTELLIGENT DESIGN POINT TO GOD?

There are many people who struggle with the idea of whether there is a God. I recognize that there are many who view belief in God as a delusion or superstition- not living in reality. Others state that belief in God is a crutch for the weak. And yet others are convinced belief in God is a non-intellectual thought pattern that has no way of being validated.

However, based on the evidence presented by scientists, there is strong evidence for intelligent design. I would now like to present a case that there is a God and that He interacts with the human race.

IS THERE A GOD?

I follow the reasoning of Dr. Don Bierle, a skeptic regarding the existence of God, as he explains in his book Surprised by Faith. He used the scrutiny and logic of his scientific background to test the foundation of faith. Dr. Bierle raised an important question; How would we know if an invisible, intangible God was not just a figment of our imagination? He believed that there was a testable strategy. If there were a real God, He would be visible and tangible, able to be seen, heard and touched on planet earth.

Dr. Bierle concluded with the assistance of writings from philosopher and theologian, Francis Schaeffer who argued that to solve the problem of purpose and meaning, God had to display two critical characteristics. 1. God had to be infinite and eternal. 2. God must be personal.

An eternal God by definition is complete and entirely perfect, lacking nothing. This God would operate outside of the finite. In fact, this God would be able to create the finite.

A personal God would be able to communicate, build relationships and is capable of love. Only a god who is “someone” rather than “something” could be seen, touched and understood.

Dr. Bierle observed that there are generally three lines of thinking regarding God, eastern thinking with Hinduism and Buddhism; western thinking with Greeks and Nordics; and the three exceptions Judaism, Islam and Christianity.

Eastern thought emphasizes the infinite God with no personal connection. Western thought emphasizes a personal yet flawed God without the eternal attribute. Judaism, Islam and Christianity all emphasize an infinite and personal God. Judaism would say God revealed himself through Moses. Islam would say God revealed himself through Mohammed. Christianity would say God revealed himself through Jesus Christ. Christianity makes the unique claim that Jesus was God. This is a claim that can be objectively analyzed and studied.

Source: Bierle, D. (2003). Surprised by Faith. Chaska: FaithSearch International

FOUR FACTORS TO CONSIDER AS YOU EXPLORE FAITH IN GOD AND BIBLICAL AUTHORITY

In his book, Questioning Evangelism, Randy Newman introduces four factors that assist individuals in exploring the validity of a faith perspective in life and Biblical authority.

Factor #1– Plausibility- This principle poses the question, “Isn’t it reasonable to believe that a God who created us could, if He wanted to, communicate with us? And couldn’t He do so through inspired writings?”

You might say you are an agnostic or an atheist and don’t believe in a God.

Mr. Newman uses an illustration. He drew a circle labeling it All Knowledge, which represents all knowledge there is to know. He then asks us to put a mark the size of the knowledge that we possess. He then shades in the area not included in the mark of knowledge that we possess (which is 99% of the circle). Mr. Newman challenges us to consider that within the shaded area of knowledge we don’t know, there could be evidence of God’s existence. I find that to be a convincing argument.

Factor #2– Messiness– The Bible is messy. Newman stated, “At first glance it seems to be writings that would discourage acceptance.” The Bible is long, repetitious, and often confusing. The Bible seems to have a hodgepodge construction, miracles that are hard to believe, and controversy over many of its assertions. If it’s plausible that God is behind the Bible, why didn’t he make his point more clearly?

Could it be that the Bible’s messiness validates its claims of inspiration and sacredness? Is it possible that the complexity of the Bible matches our complexity as human beings? We are very complex beings: intellectual, emotional, volitional, social and physical. Maybe God inspired the Bible to suit our total being.

Newman quoted Brian McLaren with an enlightening view of the Bible, “If God wants the Bible to be a book that interests, and challenges people around the globe for their whole lives, that guides us into life’s deep mysteries, that trains us to see the world from diverse points of view and in so doing, stretches us to not be so limited by our own inherited point of view, then of course it can’t be like the phone book, a government code, or a high school biology textbook-easy reference, fully indexed, conveniently formatted for quick, easy use.

Nor can it be a one read book, after which we say, “The Bible? Oh yes, I read that years ago,” implying that we’ll never have to look at it or think about it again. If God wants the book to be an authentic medium of spiritual enlightenment and instruction, then how can it be a book that we feel we can fully grasp, have control over, take pride in our knowledge of, feel competent in regard to? Mustn’t it be an untamed book that humbles us, that entices us higher up and deeper in, that renders us children rather than experts, that will sooner master us than we will master it?”

Factor #3– Reality– When we think about all the books ever written, what one stands above all others and why? The Bible is the most read book of all time. Why? There are a number of factors that contribute to its popularity and its impact on people’s lives. Some of those factors are: archaeologically verified people & places; non-biblical historical verification; eyewitness accounts; the most extensive collection of manuscripts of any book of antiquity; internal evidence; external evidence and the personal testimonies of transformed lives of the readers.

Factor #4– Meeting our Deepest Need– Our lives are a story- a beginning (birth), a middle (our story) and end (death). Human beings like to know how we fit into a bigger story, the story that gives purpose and meaning to our existence. When we consider a Biblical worldview, we see that there is a story of the human race that runs through the Bible. The story starts with creation, then rebellion takes place which requires redemption and finally we become what we were intended to be- in consummation. Randy Newman gives us one way to think of the Bible’s story line.

THE BIBLE STORY LINE

“When everything began, there already existed an eternal God who created all that is. He created us -people -as the high point of his creation and fashioned us after Him. We were made to have an intimate relationship with this creative, communicative, loving, powerful, and sovereign God. Maintaining this intimacy was the most important thing for the first people – Adam and Eve. Today, it’s still the most important thing for us. Something within us cries out for this kind of intimacy.

It is unfortunate, however, that something within the first man and woman rebelled against this relationship. Just as we still do today, they sought to be their own bosses, thinking that, on their own, they can provide what was best. The results were disastrous -and eternal. God is eternal and created us as eternal beings, thus, the consequence of their rebellion was eternal– eternal separation from him and everything that is good and holy.

The recurring themes within the Bible’s stories reflect this created-for-God/rebelling against God tension. The lives of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and the collective experience of the nation of Israel embody this tension. God’s choosing of Israel and His giving the law to them showed how a relationship between God and a group of people was supposed to be. It was to be a relationship characterized by holiness and graciousness on one side, obedience and worship on the other. The poetry of Psalms and other wisdom literature paints pictures of how it feels to be close to God (worship) and the results of turning away from Him (lamentation, concession, and alienation). The prophets and other dialectic parts of the Bible taught the Israelites ways to draw close to God and warned them of the consequences of not doing so.

Another theme intertwines with these stories -the scene of an Anointed One, a Person who would someday rectify the alienation and eliminate the tension. He was introduced in the Bible right after the first rebellion and was identified as a human being (Genesis 3: 15). As the best prophet ever, He would someday be our teacher (Deuteronomy 18:18).

Whenever this Anointed One was mentioned, an unusual language was employed that caused the reader to slow down. Like rumble strips on a highway slow you down as you approach a toll booth, messianic prophecies slowed readers down and made them wonder, Who will fulfill such things?

He was described as a King who will someday reign (2 Sam.7), a Servant who had been appointed and the One to whom the Bible says will someday suffer and die (Isa.53) and a Judge who will someday return (Zech. 12-14), and He was actually declared to be God Himself in human form (Isa. 9:6).

The dramatic high point of the Bible occurs when this Anointed One arrives- as a baby who is born precisely when, where, and how it was predicted. He taught the most amazing lessons ever proclaimed and pointed to Himself as the One in whom people could find their redemption. His death paid for sin, and His resurrection validated the completion of that payment. He was the One to whom the Bible had been pointing and the One for whom our restless hearts have been crying. His name is Jesus, a name meaning “salvation”.

The Bible ends with the consummation of the story- a picture of eternity when all of the redeemed people relate to their God with perfect intimacy. Fulfilling the very reason that they were created, they worship this God the way He deserves and without the hindrances of sin, sickness, sadness, and death. If we respond to this story in the way it says we should, we will experience an abundant, eternal life- in quality and quantity- united with our Creator-Redeemer God.”

Source:

Newman, R. (2004). Questioning Evangelism: Engaging People’s Hearts the Way Jesus Did . Grand Rapids: Kregeel Publications.

IF THERE IS A GOD, WHY DOESN’T GOD STOP EVIL?

Sharon Dirckx shares thought about this question in a talk with the title of: If God exists, then why doesn’t He just stop evil.

We see the many terrible events in the world; plane crashes, car crashes, war, child abuse, kidnapping, cancer, suffering of those who don’t deserve it. And maybe the events are more personal to you: work pressure, stress, loneliness, grief, long-term illness, divorce, family breakdown or had your heart broken. We often ask the question “why”, when looking at suffering and evil. There is a mystery to this subject, yet, “just because we don’t have all the answers doesn’t mean we can’t say some things to make more sense of our messed-up world.”

WHY IS THERE EVIL?

Ms. Dirckx raises the question that when we ask “why, who are we asking the question of “why” to? If matter is all there is, there is no one to ask the question to. Then, you could honestly respond like Christopher Hitchens, an atheist who wrote God is Not Great. When asked if he ever thought, “Why me?” after being diagnosed with cancer, said, “You cannot avoid the question no matter how stoic you are. You must bat it away as an utterly silly one. Everybody’s got to go sometime.” If God does not exist, then there is no one to ask our “why” questions to. So, if there is no one to ask, why do so many people ask the question “why”.

IS THERE A PURPOSE FOR SUFFERING?

She concludes that the very asking of the question demonstrates that we believe that there is something wrong with the world and this is not the way things were meant to be. This leads us to another question, “How was it meant to be?” Apologist Ravi Zacharias states, “When we object to suffering, we invoke a moral law.” Suffering makes us aware that something is wrong and gives us a longing for something better. Right and wrong, good and evil are brought into better focus than at any other time.

WHERE DO GOOD & EVIL COME FROM?

Ms. Dirckx continues by asking the question; “Where do right and wrong, good and evil come from?” She gives illustrations of a popular belief that they come from within each person. Each person loves the freedom of being able to decide right and wrong for themselves. However, it becomes very evident that this is a problem, when an action one person thinks is good, ends up hurting us. Then, we want to invoke a higher moral standard. In fact, if everyone just decided to do what they thought was right for them in search of greater freedom, it would lead instead to moral anarchy and the breakdown of freedom.

She then points out that a Biblical or “a Christian perspective is that right and wrong, good and evil, originate in something or someone bigger than us. They are not internally derived – they are externally derived from outside of us.

She continues, “Good is defined by, who God is; a being who does not lie, who knows no darkness, no deceit, no malice, someone you can trust, a being who is the ultimate definition of good and who has imprinted these values onto the people that He has made.” Therefore, good is a fixed, unchanging standard, no matter what culture, background or time in which you live. Evil is anything contrary to who God is. And just as good is personified, evil is also personified in the person of Satan.

An atheist would say, the problem of suffering rules out the existence of God because if God existed, He would do something about it.

A Biblical worldview would say it is the very existence of God that helps us make most sense of that gut feeling that some things are absolutely wrong, and others are absolutely right. “The existence of God enables us in a world of shifting sands to call evil ‘evil’ and to say, this is wrong.”

IS GOD GOOD?

Ms. Dirckx reports another common question that is raised about God. The question is not about if he exists but challenges his goodness. How could a loving God allow all the suffering in the world? They think He is either not all powerful, unable to do anything about it, or not loving and randomly picks people to suffer. Some people even think He has favorites in which He chooses some people for a hard life and some an easy life or that He could do something about it but chooses not to. These views question the character of His morality. Is God good?

A God like that, is not a God that any person would want to follow.

She challenges her audience to think about; if they were to create a world that was the most loving and moral world, how would they do it?

Would you create water, without which life could not exist but there also is the potential for drowning?

Would you leave out bacteria to eliminate many diseases, but impede the digestion of every living creature?

How about the people? Would you create people with just low cognitive abilities or with high cognitive abilities which would allow them to create technology that could save lives but could also wipe out all of life?

Creating a perfect world is harder than it would appear to be on the surface.

LOVE GIVES FREEDOM

“The type of world God wanted to create is one in which love is right at the center, but for love to be genuinely expressed you have to have real freedom. Free choice has to allow the possibility of wrong choice.”

When God created his world, moral freedom was given to his creation which chose to say, “I don’t need you, I can do life on my own.” This created the disconnect in the relationship between Creator and creation. As a result, there is both a noble side to humans and a capacity for unspeakable evil.

When we ask why God doesn’t stop evil, it’s not only evil out in the world but also the evil in the human heart that needs to be addressed.

Ms. Dirckx questions if we should be placing the blame for all evil on God.

Should God be held responsible for a drunk driver who takes innocent life? Or the drunk driver?

Should God be held responsible for the abuse of an elderly person in a care home? Or the care staff?

Should God be held responsible for the kidnapping and sexual abuse of children? Or the kidnappers?

JESUS CONQUERS EVIL

The conclusion of Ms. Dirckx’s talk explains that the God who created his world also stepped into history in the person of Jesus Christ to mend the disconnect between Himself and humanity. Jesus fully identified with the suffering and brokenness of the humans on a very personal level. And He did something about it. He introduced the healing of the relationship with Him and the healing of the corrupted human heart. The greatest freedom we can experience is the freedom from the evil in our own hearts, when we accept the life that Jesus offers. The Christian faith says there will be a day when God will eliminate all evil. There is a bigger story and the final word is that good wins and evil loses. That is the hope that Jesus provides.

Source:

https://www.bethinking.org/would-a-good-god-allow-suffering/if-god-exists-then-why-doesnt-he-just-stop-evil

Next: Attributes of a Biblical Worldview.

How do we overcome what went wrong in the world?

HOW DO WE OVERCOME WHAT WENT WRONG IN THE WORLD?

I would like you to consider a Biblical Worldview as we explore how to regain your value in a world, as we struggle between two opposing forces in life: good and evil.

We can’t have a discussion of worldview without talking about whether there is a God. However, before we start our discussion about whether there is a God, we need to go back to the beginning.

HOW DID ALL THIS BEGIN?

What Beginning, you ask? “The Beginning”, when our world began. When people came into existence. Now, this is where things get interesting, because there are different beliefs about how that happened.

BIG BANG?

One of the most common explanations for how the world began is the big bang theory. This theory says that the world began with a big bang and created everything in the universe. The theory continues by explaining that the earth that was formed in the big bang contained a primordial soup in which life was formed. Then that life, transformed eventually into plants, animals and then human beings.

?QUESTIONS?

An important question regarding this theory is how did the matter in the big bang theory come into existence?

Another important question regarding the big bang theory is how did the placement of planets especially earth, come to be in an alignment that was perfect for human life? If the earth was further away from the sun, everything would be frozen, and any closer to the sun and we would be burnt up.

Regarding the formation of life on earth, out of the primordial soup, what are the chances of all the elements needed for life could be randomly found in the proper configuration for life to begin?

Once life was formed, what are the chances of simple forms of life mutating into more complex forms of life and those forms of life mutating into the life that we have now? Did we really evolve from apes?

It appears that those who believe these “theories” are exercising faith. However, I have questions about the reliability of the evidence they use to inform their faith.

ANOTHER WAY TO EXPLAIN HOW IT ALL BEGAN

There are other ways of explaining how our world and life on earth came into existence.

One of the most powerful line of thinking about how everything began is called Intelligent Design. There are many respected scientists who propose that if there is a design to the universe and all life in the universe then logically there would be a Designer.

What leads scientists to believe there is a design? There are many examples of design. Designs can be seen in both the macroscopic world as well as the microscopic world. The designs in the macroscopic world includes: the immensity of the universe-stars, planets and galaxies with their specific orbital patterns. The designs in the microscopic world include: the intricacies of the DNA/RNA structure of plants, animals and human beings.

FAITH AND SCIENCE ARE COMPATABLE

The intellectual foundation for combining faith and science has been expanding each year as we make new discoveries.

One author put it this way, “For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So, they are without excuse.”

Lee Strobel in The Case for a Creator, lays out the case for a creator using scientific evidence from the fields of cosmology, physics, astronomy, biochemistry, DNA research and the study of human consciousness.

Allan Sandage, the renowned cosmetologist stated, “It was my science that drove me to the conclusion that the world is much more complicated than can be explained by science. It was only through the supernatural that I can understand the mystery of existence.”

Even Galileo had an aphorism- “Science tells you how the heavens go, and the Bible tells you how to go to heaven.”

Stephen Meyer, geophysicist states, “…Scientific evidence actually supports theistic belief. In fact, across a wide range of sciences, evidence has come to light in the last fifty years which, taken together, provides a robust case for theism. Only theism can provide an intellectually satisfying causal explanation for all this evidence. Science done right, points toward God.” Science and faith are not at war. When scientific evidence and biblical teaching are properly interpreted, they can and do support each other.

Meyer goes on to point out areas of evidence that proves his point. The Big Bang and its accompanying theoretical underpinnings in general relativity, point out the definite beginning of the universe. Anthropic fine tuning – the fundamental laws and constants mathematically combine in an incredible way to make life in the universe possible. If the expansion rate of the universe is altered at all, life in the universe would not be possible. Next, he observes the origin of life and the information to make life possible leads to the causal entity capable of producing information- namely intelligence. In addition, he affirms the design in complex molecular and biological systems that defy the proposed natural selection process.

One renowned cosmetologists William Lane Craig developed the kalam cosmological argument introduced by Muslim theologian al-Ghazali who highlighted that, “Whatever begins to exist has a cause. The universe began to exist. Therefore, the universe has a cause.” Craig elaborates on what can be deduced about the cause. “A cause of space and time must be an uncaused, beginningless, timeless, spaceless, immaterial, personal being endowed with freedom of will and enormous power, and that is the concept of God.”

He went on to elaborate on the two explanations of a cause- scientific and personal. “…there cannot be a scientific explanation of the first state of the universe. Since it is the first state, it simply cannot be explained in terms of earlier initial conditions and natural laws leading up to it. So, if there is an explanation of the first state of the universe, it has to be a personal explanation – that is, an agent who has volition to create it.” Craig adds that another reason it is personal; since it transcends space and time, therefore being an immaterial reality- an unembodied mind would have brought the universe into existence. And finally, a personal agent would have freedom of will and could say, “Let there be light” and the universe could spring into existence.

Scientists have been questioning the reliability of the Darwin’s Theory of Evolution.

Jonathan Wells, a molecular & cellular biologist from Cal-Berkeley found that the Haeckel’s embryo drawings that reportedly proved a common ancestry of fish, salamander, tortoise, chicken, hog, calf, rabbit and human were faked and he was discredited by his colleagues.

Wells concludes, “I believe science is pointing strongly toward design. To me as a scientist, the development of an embryo cries out, “Design!” The Cambrian explosion- the sudden appearance of complex life, with no evidence of ancestors- is more consistent with design than evolution. Similarity across species, in my opinion, is more compatible with design…. When you analyze all of the most current evidence from cosmology, physics, astronomy, biology , and so forth- well, I think you’ll discover that the positive case for an Intelligent designer becomes absolutely compelling.”

Even the claim that humans evolved from apes using the “Java man” was discredited by Sir Arthur Keith, prominent Cambridge University anatomist and nineteen other evolutionist.

Michael Bebe, a biochemist, who explains the science of the living cell concludes, “My conclusion can be summed up in a single word: design,” “I say that based on science. I believe that an irreducibly complex systems are strong evidence of a purposeful, intentional design by an intelligent agent. No other theory succeeds; certainly not Darwinism.”

Source: Strobel, L. (2004) The Case for a Creator. Grand Rapids: Zondervan

I agree with those who find merit in the intelligent design theory and I believe that the God of the Bible is that designer who created all that we see and experience.

In fact, many of the scientific laws and discoveries we have today were predicted in the Biblical records centuries before they were uncovered.

BIBLICAL PREDICTED SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERIES

Did you know that the Bible predicted scientific discoveries centuries before they were uncovered? Eternal Productions lists those predictions in their booklet, 101 Scientific Facts & Foreknowledge.

Genesis 1:1– The universe had a beginning. Einstein and other scientists confirm what the Bible said.

Genesis 1:1-3– Expresses all 4 scientific terms for the universe- time, space, matter and energy.

Job 26:7– The earth free-floats in space.

Isaiah 40:22– The earth is a sphere. Many thought the earth was flat.

Psalm 19:6– The sun goes in a circuit.

Jeremiah 33:22– Incalculable number of stars. Astronomers estimate 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 (ten thousand billion trillion) stars.

I Corinthians 15:41– Each star is unique, varying in size and intensity.

Job 9:8; Isaiah 42:5; Jeremiah 51:15; Zechariah 12:1– The universe is expanding as discovered by Edwin Hubble.

Genesis 2:1-2– First Law of Thermodynamics established. The total quantity of energy and matter in the universe is a constant.

Psalm 102:25-26; Hebrews 1:11– The Second Law of Thermodynamics (Entropy) explained. The law states that the universe is running down, deteriorating, constantly becoming less orderly. Evolutionary theory directly contradicts this law.

Genesis 6:15– The Bible specifies the perfect dimensions (a length six times that of the width) for a stable water vessel.

Ecclesiastes 1:7; Jeremiah 10:13; Amos 9:6; Job 36:27-28– Hydrological cycle described.

Job 38:16– Oceans have springs.

Jonah 2:5-6– Mountains on the bottom of the oceans.

Psalms 8:8– Ocean currents anticipated. Matthew Maury- father of oceanography confirmed the paths of the sea.

Ecclesiastes 1:6– Jet stream anticipated. It was just during World War II that airmen discovered the jet stream circuit.

Ezekiel 47:12; Revelation 22:2– Tree leaves as medicine.

Genesis 1:11; 29– Life of plants is in its seed. Within the seed is a tiny factory of amazing complexity. 1 Corinthians 15:36-38 acknowledges a seed must die to produce new life. John 12:24 confirms two fundamental biological concepts: 1. Cells arise only from existing cells. 2. A grain must die to produce more grain.

Genesis 11– Language groups origin explained. Evolution has no explanation how thousands of diverse languages came from a common ancestor.

Hebrews 11:3– Creation is made of particles indiscernible to our eyes.

Genesis 1:24– There are natural limits to biological change. Scientists observe horizonal genetic boundaries beyond which life cannot vary. Dogs produce dogs, cats produce cats, roses produce roses. There is no credible evidence that one kind has changed into another kind.

Genesis 1:20-22– Chicken & the egg dilemma solved. The Bible states God created birds with the ability to reproduce after their kind.

Genesis 1:27-28; 2:24; Mark 10:6-8- Reproduction explained. Evolution has no explanation how reproductive organs evolved at the same time.

Jeremiah 1:5– Life begins at fertilization. God declares that He knew us before we were born. Job 10: 8-12; 31:15- God fashions and knits us together in the womb. Exodus 21: 22-23- The biblical penalty for murdering an unborn child was death. Today, it is irrefutable that the fertilized egg is an entire human being. Nothing will be added to the first cell except nutrition and oxygen.

Isaiah 45:18– The earth was designed for life. This affirms the Anthropic Principle that our earth and cosmos are so finely tuned that any fundamental characteristic was changed, life could not exist.

Genesis 1– The Law of Biogenesis explained. Life only comes from existing life.

Genesis 2:7; 3:19– Our bodies are made from the dust of the earth. Scientists have discovered the human body is comprised of 28 base and trace elements – all found in the earth.

Exodus 20:11– Protein and DNA created together. Proteins are in living things, yet the code for each protein is contained in the DNA/RNA system. However, proteins are required to manufacture DNA. Which came first? The only explanation is they were created together.

Leviticus 17:11;14– Blood is the source of life and health.

Acts 17:26; Genesis 5– All mankind came from one gene pool, confirmed by a 1995 study.

Deuteronomy 23:12-13– The establishment of healthy sanitation practices.

Leviticus 13:45-46; Numbers 5:1-4– Medical quarantine instituted.

Leviticus 15:13- The need to wash clothes and body with running water to prevent disease.

Exodus 22:31– Microorganisms anticipated. Decaying carcasses contain disease causing germs.

I Corinthians 6:18; Romans 1:27– Sexual promiscuity is dangerous to your health.

Romans 1:20-32– Rejection of the Creator results in moral depravity.

Acts 14:17– The source of emotions explained. Evolution cannot explain emotions because energy & matter do not feel.

Psalm 16:11; 36:8; Genesis 2:9; I Timothy 6:17– Pleasure explained. Evolution has no explanation for pleasure.

Proverbs 17:22– Laughter promotes physical healing by reducing levels of stress hormones bringing balance to the immune system which helps fight off disease.

Proverbs 18:14; Mark 14:34– Intense sorrow or stress is harmful to your health. Studies show that stressful incidents contribute to stress cardiomyopathy; including chest pain, breathing difficulty, low blood pressure and heart failure.

John 15:13; Romans 5:7-8– Noble behavior is understood. The Bible and history reveal countless people endangering and even sacrificing their lives for another. This is at odds with Darwin’s survival of the fittest.

Genesis 4:20-22; Job 8:8-10; 12:12– Our ancestors were not primitive. Archaeology confirms mining, metallurgy, air-conditioned buildings, designed cities, designed musical instruments, studied the stars, understood agriculture and much more. This contradicts evolutionists claims.

Job 30:1-8- “Cavemen” described in the Bible as outcasts and vagabonds.

Next: Does Intelligent Design point to God?

20 Family Stresses and Top 10 Ratings from Married Women, Married Men and Single Mothers

Delores Curran in her book Stress and the Healthy Family started out with a longer list of family stresses that affect how well the family functions and works together. This was narrowed down to the top 10 lists as the families in the study were surveyed.

She defined dis-stress as a condition that exists when family life gets out of control. Ms. Curran lists the following symptoms of a constantly stressful family:

A constant sense of urgency and hurried; no time to release and relax
Tension that underlies and causes sharp words, sibling fighting, misunderstandings
A mania to escape -to one’s room, car, garage, away
Feelings of frustration over not getting things done
A feeling that time is passing too quickly; children are growing up too fast
A nagging desire for a simpler life; constant talk about times that were or will be simpler
Little “me” or couple time
A pervasive sense of guilt for not being and doing everything to and for all the people in one’s life

TOP 20 Family Stresses

The following list of stresses were not highly ranked, so they were dropped from the final survey. They include some everyday stresses, major crisis situations or pervasive individual issues. They were not as common, however, will still benefit by the helpful strategies given in the book.

The retirement

widowhood

drug/alcohol

House guests

Nuclear and environmental fears

Older parents church and school activities

family vacations

Remarriage

Relationship with former spouse

Summers

Unsatisfactory housing

Two-paycheck family

Organized sports/activities

Change and work patterns

Homework/school/grades

Religious differences

Weekends

Pre-dinner hour

Unemployment

Now we will list the rankings for Married Women, Married Men and Single Mothers.

FAMILY STRESSES	MARRIED MEN	MARRIED WOMEN	SINGLE MOTHERS

1.	Economics/finances/budgeting	Economics/finances/budgeting	Economics/finances/budgeting
2.	Insufficient couple of time	Lack of shared responsibility in the family	Guilt for not accomplishing more
3.	Communicating with children	Insufficient couple of time	Insufficient “me” time
4.	Children’s behavior/ discipline/ sibling fighting	Children’s behavior/ discipline/ sibling fighting	Self-image/self-esteem/ feelings of unattractiveness
5.	Spousal relationship (communication, friendship, sex)	Housekeeping standards	Children’s behavior/ discipline/ sibling fighting
6.	Over a scheduled family calendar	Insufficient “me” time	Unhappiness with work situation
7.	Insufficient “me” time	Guilt for not accomplishing more	Housekeeping standards
8.	Unhappiness with work situation	Insufficient family play time	Communicating with children
9.	Insufficient family play time	Spousal relationship (communication, friendship, sex)	Insufficient family play time
10.	Television	Self-image/self-esteem/ feelings of unattractiveness	Lack of shared responsibility in the family

Source: Curran, D. (n.d.). Stress and the Healthy Family.

Next: How perspective is vital in managing Stress and Crisis.

What went wrong? Why is the world such a mess?

WHAT WENT WRONG?

Let’s go back to our earlier conversation about the opposing forces in life. If we are honest with ourselves, there is an internal self-centeredness that has captured each one of us. This destructive force is what hurts us and our relationships. One author said it this way: “Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth.” This destructive force produces a constant internal battle about the way we treat ourselves and others. These destructive forces deceive and distract us from remembering our value and the value of everyone on earth. Jesus said it this way, “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.”

As we navigate this journey called life, this human nature seems to intrude on our lives more and more. We see it on a large scale all over the world, in wars, genocide, human trafficking and other evil that destroys lives. We also see it on a more personal level in our own lives. The everyday actions we received from our parents, peers and others, as we grew up; either tore down our value or affirmed our value.

For many of us, those interactions tell us, we are not worthy of love and didn’t affirm our value as human beings. It’s often the small comments or times when someone loses control of their emotions, that wounded our sense of value given at our birth. We long to be told we are worthy of love. There are many ways that a wounded person begins to strive to regain that value. And I am convinced that most of the problems in our world result from this wounding of our value and our attempts to regain that value.

ATTEMPTS TO REGAIN OUR VALUE

Have you noticed that people use many strategies to overcome their woundedness, to regain their value as a human being?

C. S. Lewis once said, “If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world.”

There is a craving to find our value that was lost in our lives up to this point. Let’s look at some of the strategies we use to regain our value and if they are effective. There are basically two strategies with several sub-strategies:

Things you acquire or do. Many people say that the answer to the need for value is: Wealth or Power or Position or Prestige or Trophies or Strength or Beauty or Intelligence or Education or Humor or Efficiency or Servanthood or Addictions or Control of Others or Theft or Deception or Fitting in with the Crowd. All these strategies will fulfill the need for value temporarily. However, it doesn’t take long in a conversation with a person who has gained one or all of these “value builders” to find that they have not met the deeper need of intimacy and connection. You often hear the comment, “My life is empty.”
Looking inside yourself. Many people say people are basically good. They say if you look inside yourself you will get in touch with that goodness. In fact, I was a strong believer in this view. I now challenge that assumption. Remember the opposing forces in our world that always battle inside us? If I’m honest with myself I fail to live up to the standards of goodness that I desire to live by. As much as we try to control our human nature, it it proves to be an overpowering force in human life. We even see this inner selfishness and jealousy start early in life, as young as small toddlers.

Wow, Walt, that seems pretty harsh. Don’t you have any positive news?

Next: Yes, I do have some very positive, optimistic and hopeful news. I would like to present the idea of embracing a Biblical worldview as a quest to be a stronger and more united family.

Where Do We Get Our Value?

WHERE DO WE GET OUR VALUE?

Going back to when we are born, what gives us value and gives us a sense of belonging? We are unable to talk or contribute in any meaningful way as a baby human. We require a lot of help just to survive; being fed, being kept warm and clean, being talked to and being given lots of attention which translates into connection and intimacy.

What about when babies are not wanted and aren’t cared for, do they still have value, do they still belong?

YOUR VALUE & IDENTITY AND A PLACE WHERE YOU BELONG

I would challenge you to consider this: You are designed and formed by a Creator who gives you value just because He created you and He loves you. You gain your identity and belong to His family. You were created on purpose for a purpose. No matter what happens to you or what others say about you, can change your identity and value or your place in His family. This is what gives each person who was ever born their value. And this is the reason we are to treat each human being with which we interact as special, unique and worthy of care and kindness.

Let’s face it, the world is not a caring and kind place. So, what happened?

Next: What went wrong? Why is the world for the most part not a kind or caring place?

The Top Ten Stresses Families Manage

Delores Curran in her book Stress and the Healthy Family points out the top 10 stresses that affect everyday family life. However, just listing the stresses doesn’t begin to help us understand the complexity of the decisions between individual family members that are involved in family life. So, let’s look at the dynamics of family stress.

THE DYNAMICS OF FAMILY STRESS

Most families have more conflict and stress over individual expectations about an area of family life rather than the specific issues in the family.

A common family issue is television, yet is this an actual or perceived stress?

Even without a television, stress would remain because each of the family members perceives the use of time and have different expectations. What makes one member happy, stresses another. Is free time in the family, my time, our time or their time?

The real underlying stress is not actually the television but a conflict about who makes the decision about free time. The individual? The couple? The family? The employer? A needed household chore? (Some families look at free time as time to clean and repair the car or home.)

The expectations about time usage comes from several sources: an individual’s perception of rights, one’s childhood or the media’s image of family.

A SAMPLE SITUATION

A hypothetical family might look like this:

Mom is unhappy because her dream of spending Sundays doing some shared family activities- a day at the beach, a trip to grandma’s or playing yard games; her real family is uninterested in sharing these activities.

Dad is unhappy because he expects Sunday to be “his” time after a long week at work. He finally has time to sit in his easy chair, read the paper and watch football.

The kids are unhappy because that wanted to play with the other kids in the neighborhood.

TALKING ABOUT AND WORKING THROUGH EXPECTATIONS

The solution to this stressful family situation is not an easy one. The answer has 3 parts.

The first part of the answer is for the family members to accept the fact that there is no answer that will please all members every Sunday.
The next part of the answer is for each family member to examine and share their unspoken expectations.
The final part of the answer is a change in attitude. Healthy families develop an attitude that says, “I care enough about your expectations and needs, that I am willing to give up some of mine.” Communication and compromise lead to a solution that meet the needs of each family member in achieving their preferences in a fair way. This shift in attitude helps strengthen family connections and unity. Different families will solve these different expectations in different ways. However, they work on a solution together.

COMMON REACTIONS OF FAMILIES WHO HANDLE STRESS EFFECTIVELY

They recognize stress is temporary and can even be positive.
They work together on solutions- building family skills and connections.
They develop new family rules about prioritizing time and shared responsibilities.
They look at stress as a normal part of family life not a sign of failure.
They feel good about effectively dealing with the stressors together.

COMMON REACTIONS OF FAMILIES WHO STRUGGLE HANDLING STRESS

They feel guilty for allowing a stress to exist.
They try to place blame rather than look for a solution to the problem.
They give in to stress and give up trying to master it.
They focus on the family’s problems rather than strengths.
They feel weaker instead of stronger after experiencing normal stress.
They grow to dislike family life due to built up stresses.

All families have reactions to stress from both lists; however, each family member can be a part of solving or lessening those normal family stresses by remembering those effective strategies listed above.

Ok, I’ve teased you long enough about the Top 10 Stresses Families Manage!

THE TOP 10 STRESSES FAMILIES MANAGE

Economics / Finances / Budgeting
Children’s Behavior / Discipline / Sibling Fighting
Insufficient Couple Time
Lack of Shared Responsibility in the Family
Communicating with Children
Insufficient “me” Time
Guilt for Not Accomplishing More
Spousal Relationship (Communication, Friendship, Intimacy)
Insufficient Family Play Time
Overscheduled Family Calendar

It’s interesting that Ms. Curran started with a list of 45 stresses and narrowed the survey down to 25 stresses for the survey that resulted in the Top 10 Stresses. You will see that the Top 10 Stresses differ for Married Women, Married Men and Single Mothers.

Next: The List of 25 Family Stresses and the Top 10 Ratings for Married Women, Married Men and Single Mothers.

Satisfying Our Needs in Life

SATISFYING OUR NEEDS IN LIFE

When we get right down to it, what I see as the most powerful force in navigating this journey called life, is our need for intimacy and connection. What will satisfy that need?

INTIMACY & CONNECTION

I am convinced we are wired for intimacy and connection which places us on a search for connection and intimacy as soon as we are born. At birth, we sought out intimacy and connection with our mother and then with our father. When we look at the confusion and chaos in the world, I would propose that we are witnessing the lack of connection and intimacy. What will satisfy that need?

I agree with Blaise Pascal, the French mathematician, physicist, inventor, writer and theologian who raised an interesting perspective in this discussion. He said, “There is a God-shaped vacuum in the heart of each man which cannot be satisfied by any created thing but only by God the Creator, made know through Jesus Christ.”

WHO AM I? WHERE DO I BELONG?

The questions, “Who am I?” and “Where do I belong?” become very significant especially in this modern world of conflicting messages and distractions about what gives us value and where we belong.

What will satisfy the need for intimacy and connection is a relationship with the One who made you and wants to have a relationship with you.

Next, where do we get our value?

Strengths Pessimists use in approaching Stress and Crisis.

In the last post, Defining Stress and Crisis we discovered that there were many benefits of optimism that can relieve stress and help us get through crises. But you might be wondering: What if I’m a Pessimist? Does my outlook have any strengths?

The answer is: Yes! Pessimists with their outlook on life, use some strengths in their dealing with stresses and crises. Therefore, both optimism and pessimism can play important roles in our lives.

Jeremy Dean in his article Optimism vs. Pessimism observed in several studies that:

“Being optimistic allows people to pursue their goals in a positive way: to dream a bigger and better dream, which they can work their way towards. Optimists also seem to respond better to positive feedback, and part of being optimistic may be generating this feedback for themselves, i.e. thinking positive thoughts.”

“On the other hand, being pessimistic may help people reduce their natural anxiety and to perform better. Also, pessimists seem to respond better to negative feedback. They like to hear what the problems were, so they can correct them. Again, part of why pessimists generate these sorts of negative thoughts is that it helps them perform better.”

Mr. Dean concluded, “Optimism and pessimism aren’t just accidents; this evidence suggests they are two different, but effective, strategies of coping with a complex and unpredictable world.”

Both Optimists and Pessimists can be encouraged that they were created with wiring that helps then deal with the many stresses and crises they will face in their lives. So, relax and flow with the outlook on life that you take into your world each day.

Next: The Top Ten Stresses Families Manage

References

Dean, J. (n.d.). https://psychcentral.com/blog/pessimism-vs-optimism/.